Honesty in advertising

I give credit where credit is due.

For awhile now, Domino’s Pizza has been doing everything in their power to let consumers know the truth about their pizza: it tastes awful.  I was, sincerely, unaware of this (with a cheaper, closer alternative, I don’t ever order Domino’s).  That is, until they ran an ad campaign composed of various segments of the above video.  At that point I learned that Domino’s pizza taste like cardboard, has ketchup instead of marinara sauce, and is not made with real cheese.  (To be honest, the amazed and shocked look on the chef’s face when he sees/smells real cheese is rather disturbing, given his job.)  Also, once the pizza is made, Domino’s doesn’t know how to box and/or deliver the pizza.

Domino’s, in an effort to fix their image and replace it with something hip and trendy, has turned to crowd sourcing.  Send them pictures of your pizza, tell them how awful it is, and, now, come up with “proverbs” to be placed on pizza boxes.

I am going to ignore the proverbs, by and large, since they were made, allegedly, by regular folk and not by a corporation that pays people to handle its public image.  Two exceptions.  One: “Satisfying Fulfillment!”  This did not make the boxes, but is listed as one of the “Top Proverbs.”  This stands out for an amazing number of reasons, given that it is only two words.  First, the redundancy.  Satisfaction and fulfillment are synonymous in some usages, and, ignoring that, how can “fulfillment” not be satisfying?  Well, I’ll actually answer that one, since I asked.  The one instance would be the definition of “fulfillment” as “the process… of handling or executing customer orders,” in which case we have already seen that Domino’s fulfillment is not satisfying.  Second, the interpretation of “proverb.”  Relevant definition: “a short popular saying… that expresses effectively some commonplace truth or useful thought.”  Being the magnanimous gentleman that I am, I will give the author credit for “short.”  I will not, however, give the author credit for what (in my humble opinion) is the more necessary component–“thought” (“useful” being too far beyond the scope of this verbal regurgitation).  And this segues to the third bit of note: the author.  The author is allegedly a “Dr” and one whom I will not be requesting any doctoral services from.

The second proverb of note was a “winner” and is featured on pizza boxes that are actually delivered (someone brought over Domino’s and our box had this “proverb” on it, so I know it’s real):


Most, with the notable exception of the Dr, of the entries simply took well known quotes and substituted in pizza-related verbage.   That is not why this stands out.  It stands out because of the original quote: “Fools rush in where angels fear to tread” (Alexander Pope).  You’ve probably noticed that Domino’s has equated its product, pizza, with “fools,” and a competing (I guess?) food product, burgers, with “angels.”  I say you’ve probably noticed this fowl up, but if you happened to be associated with Domino’s, clearly you haven’t, as it’s all over your pizza boxes.


Published in: on 30 June 2011 at 6:40 pm  Leave a Comment  
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